"mrlobosknights," the official Y! Group! Become a member for FREE today!!

6/22/07 Update

Reprinted with kind permission from Monster Island News ...

Cinema Insomnia (2001 - Present)

"The best show on television...that you probably have never heard of."

Mr. Lobo hosts "The Last man On Earth"

Cinema Insomnia is one of the last true late night horror movie showcases done in the tradition that Bob Wilkins and Elvira made famous. Many of us grew up watching these wonderfully unique programs back in the days before DVD, VCR, and yes even Cable TV. In the not so distant past, late night programs like these were the only outlet for viewing classic B films, monster movies, and horror classics. Cinema Insomnia recaptures the nostalgia of this time in TV history perfectly.

Gigantis the Fire Monster is finally available on DVD. Hosted by Mr. Lobo for the cable program Cinema Insomnia, this disk recaptures the feel of old fashioned late night movie nostalgia. Many older readers will remember that this is how these films used to be seen in an era long before DVD, VHS, or for that fact Cable TV. Mr. Lobo does an excellent job adding comic relief  between scenes and there are alot of good trailers and classic adds added into the mix. Overall a great trip down memory lane for those of us who can remember and great campy fun for the younger generation.

The film itself is a testimony on how not to edit a motion picture. Warner Bros. did the worst job imaginable on this film. The dubbing is the worst of any Godzilla film. The voice acters get the names of the monsters confused many times. The same monster is called Gigantis in one scene and Angilasaurus in the next. The sound department even mixed up the monsters roars. Godzilla is seen through most the film with Angilas's roar coming out of his mouth. The film itself is in fairly pour condition but still very watchable. There are a couple of scenes that get so dark that it is hard to make things out. Despite the films condition this is still a film that has rarely been seen, mostly forgotten, so this is probably as good it will ever be. Toho itself doesn't own a screenable print.
Copies of the disk are available at Cinema Insomnia for $15.99.

Mr. Lobo knows Dick

MONSTER ISLAND NEWS DVD Review:
Cinema Insomnia - Dick Tracy Meets Gruesome (1947)

Mr. Lobo, Prime-8 and Astronaughty fight to save Starcrash.

MONSTER ISLAND NEWS DVD Review:

STARCRASH(1979)

Mr. Lobo has discovered that the last copy of Starcrash exists on board the Deep Space Super Station One. Many years ago before the last copies of the film were destroyed by the combined efforts of the Caroline Monroe Fan Club, Christopher Plummber's estate and George Lucas's lawyers, the deep space station recorded the film on magnetic tape. By using one of two Dynabeam receivers (Lobo has one and Europes number one horror hostess Astra Naughty has the other) Lobo is able to broadcast Starcrash for his Sleepless Knights to enjoy.

Lobo's Dynabeam feed is interrupted when a group of Louisiana Klingons attack the station. The stations curator jettisons the tapes before the station is destroyed, but they are now scattered across the galaxy.

Lucky for Mr. Lobo his European counterpart Astra Naughty has a spaceship...and a large set of glands. Together with their robot companion Ro-Man the two set out to find the lost tapes. Their quest leads them to the most remote sections of the galaxy including the evil space station of movie tie-in merchandise. In the end Mr. Lobo"s haggling skills fetch the last tape from the hands of a crazed salesman on the Garage Sale Planet. Once again Starcrash has been saved for future generations....to um...enjoy.

Without a doubt this is by far the most polished episode of Cinema Insomnia to date. Lobo's comic talents are showcased in several wonderful sci-fi parodies that match perfectly with the copy-cat film Starcrash. Also included are some great bits featuring Kristie Fenyo as the European sex kitten Astra Naughty. There is a interesting cameo by Church of Ed Wood founder Reverend Steve who pleads his case that Starcrash is a worse film than Plan 9 From Outer Space. I don't think any of us could argue against that.

'Creature' Cinema Insomnia Style

From our Monster Island New Forums

mistermonster1954 commensts about
Cinema Insomnia Episode "Creature"

Being an avid fan of Mr. Lobo's show , Cinema Insomnia , I find it refreshing and original and Always entertaining !The episode of " CREATURE " ( 1984 ) is a prime example of his versatile talent and originality of production of his show ." CREATURE " , unfortunatly , has always been referred to as a rip - off of Ridley Scott's " ALIEN " ( 1979 ) , ( If you have seen the film , the monster DOES have a general likeness to the " ALIEN " monster ) however plenty of gratuatis sex and violence added .The BEST thing about this episode , to me , are Mr. Lobo's ' Wraps " around the film itself , as he searches for the reels of the film in space and Miss Mittens annoys him with the " Monster head " , by drooling on him ! Also , at the beginning of the show , he is about to announce that Ridley Scott's " ALIEN " is the movie for the night , when he is informed that ' ALIEN " is too costly so they must show a " rip -off " version instead !

Some of my very favorite segments of the show are the retro commercials that certainly bring back those memories of me being a kid ! This is just one of MANY Cinema Insomnia episodes that I HIGHLY RECOMMEND you viewers add to your busy T.V.watching.

This article was published in The Sacramento News & Reveiw on 06.14.07.

That’s Mister Lobo to you. To everybody, actually.

Hopefully Old Sac’s Willemina’s Restaurant and Bar will pardon any initial skepticism about its hosting of the Lobotronic Film Show last Thursday night. The bar has a great old-school vibe, a regular schedule of live music and deep-fried, um, everything, but most folks who descend its grimy staircase probably don’t imagine it’s the best place to watch a movie. Luckily, a balmy night and some planning ahead dispelled any doubts, as somebody had set up a large-ish screen and plenty of seating on the spacious back patio to properly accommodate the evening’s festivities.

As to what exactly those festivities were, well, that’s a bit harder to describe. The Lobotronic Film Show, begun last year and hosted by Sactown’s own nationally syndicated late-night superstar, Mr. Lobo—with his frequent companion, the positively Amazonian Queen of Trash—featured four hours of bizarre bygone commercials, TV spots, film trailers and other assorted weirdness screened via satisfyingly scratchy 16mm projection. Highlights from the first half of last Thursday’s program included “Outdoor Tips with Corn Kix,” a vintage “Rock ’Em Sock ’Em Robots” ad and a crowd-pleasingly profane collection of outtakes from the original Star Trek. Suffice it to say that by the time a gloriously cheesy Xerox safety presentation filled the screen, you were either along for the ride or left alone in a roadside ditch.

A robust and surprisingly diverse group of folks did come along, gathering in the night with plastic cups in hand and eyes fixed on the peculiar pop-culture pablum unspooling before them. Although some lasted longer than others, most everyone attending was jovial and engaged; all seemed to consider themselves in the presence of greatness. Inside the bar’s dim caverns, two additional screens bore other, digitally projected goodies, like the schlocky low-budget Vincent Price vehicle The Last Man on Earth and episodes of Mr. Lobo’s B-movie-showcase TV show, Cinema Insomnia.

The many who missed out should have no fear, for the Lobotronic Film Show soon will return. Another program is planned as part of the inaugural Sacramento Horror Film Festival, coming this fall (www.sachorrorfilmfest.com). Last week’s show actually served in part as a fund-raiser for the fest, which will take place at Stockton Boulevard’s historic Colonial Theater. Mr. Lobo and the Queen of Trash once again will host, this time presiding over a whole weekend full of screenings, live music and star appearances. So, if getting to meet Tony “Candyman” Todd in person somehow isn’t enough to entice you out to the Colonial come October, the mind-expanding Lobotronic Film Show should do the trick.

CREATURSCAPE - SPRING 2006 CINEMA INSOMNIA!

At first glance, it would appear that the planets have aligned for Mr. Lobo and Cinema Insomnia.   His show just went national on UATV, broadcasting the show on Saturday nights in more than a dozen states!  In fact, KCTU is web-casting the program every Saturday night at 11 p.m. central time.  His shows are also now available through a Major DVD distributor, which is web-casting them too!  Mr. Lobo has entertained large audiences in movie houses up and down the coast of California with sophisticated special effects, great guests and comedy that is genuinely funny.  He even made the cover of FilmFax, not to mention all this cool CreatureScape exposure.

So, who is Mr. Lobo? Hmmmm . . . where to begin?  Enigmatic, understated and subtle, Mr. Lobo sits in a rocking chair on a mostly black set.  The minimalist, displaced hipster appearance of our host (a conscious homage to California's Creature Features with Bob Wilkins and John Stanley) is deceivingly placid.  While at first glance Mr. Lobo looks like a retro pop-culture psychoanalyst sorting out the collective unconscious with a random collection of films and clips, beneath the cool exterior simmers an insomniac's spirit guide.  He moves with mildly exaggerated physical gestures . . . pointing with two fingers, jerking his head suddenly to odd angles, engaging in off screen conversations . . . all the while referring to himself in third person.  The effect is a slight of hand that makes the subtle satire all the more enjoyable. Mr. Lobo is part guide, part observer, part critic and part experimenter.  Like a post-postmodern man, he creates something new out of the cinematic salvage heap left to horror hosts and each trip through Mr. Lobo's domain is like a guided tour of the Island of Misfit Toys.   As a result, Cinema Insomnia is marked by a wonderful displacement in time and culture, full of juxtaposed images from our collective past and present.

And Cinema Insomnia? Cinema Insomnia has style.  The show begins, for instance, with an extended  intro which is always slightly unique.  Your journey begins with a few vintage commercials for nearly forgotten toys and maybe a Godzilla or B-movie trailer, like you're channel surfing after midnight in an alternative universe.  Then, after 3 seconds of bikini dancers with strange choreography, you are suddenly pulled into Mr. Lobo's domain.  Like a cross between classic Star Trek and Twilight Zone openings with cool West Coast jazz theme, Cinema Insomnia's first three minutes are unique and captivating.

Sure, you've seen celebrity interviews, but only Mr. Lobo has the resources to bring you Sasquatch's prom date.  Hey, what's that she's holding in her hand?

There are strangely sudden and yet seamless shifts in and out of the night's movie.  You get the feeling that the movies are a template, not a centerpiece, and the feature really becomes a vehicle for Mr. Lobo's show and not the other way around.   And that's great because Cinema Insomnia is pleasantly surreal and indulgently nerdy.

The show is grounded with regular features, however.   Each show has an intermission, with interviews and long-lost cartoons and theater promos from the past like "Let's go out to the lobby."  But there is no way to tell what is coming next and if you are going to get up and make a sandwich, the intermission is not the time.  Mr. Lobo also has a Mail Sac (you know what I mean) and answers letters in the way only Mr. Lobo can.  And then, there are the special offers like the romantic "Candles, Krankor and You" record album and instructions on how to make your own "Blood-O-Vision" goggles.

Cyberhost and Community Pillar: Mr. Lobo is a truly interactive host, with a long history of film and fan events to his credit.  Just a few months ago he hosted House on Haunted Hill complete with flying skeletons, blood dripping from the ceiling and Vincent Price's strange Emergo skeleton puppet effect.  Pretty cool, eh?  Don't fret just because missed it.  For those living in California, you can often find Mr. Lobo selflessly providing anti-homogenizing live entertainment.  And if you don't live there,  you still have plenty of time to move there and catch one of the dozens of public appearances each year, with a few coming right around the corner.  Why, there's SiliCON (Oct. 7-9) in San Jose, Horror Host Palooza at San Fran's Thrillsville on Oct. 13 and "Shock It To Me," a horror film festival in the Bay City's haunted Castro Theater Halloween weekend.  Seriously, what more could you want?

The website is an extension of the show and is one of the most extensive and regularly updated sites in the host world you will find.  There are clips and even episodes for download as well as info on the latest public appearances and road show reviews.   If you are not getting Cinema Insomnia in your hometown, there is a list of potential stations you can petition on the Cinema Insomnia site, too. And there is helpful, if dubious, information to complete your viewing experience in the Fanboy Lounge.  For example, Mr. Lobo provides a few "Things You Never Knew about Devil Doll," as reprinted below.

Things You Never Knew About Devil Doll (1964) by Mr. Lobo There are many differences between the European cut and the American cut of the film: The original has a starring credit for Bryant Haliday as "The Great Vorelli," but the American credits Tab Hunter above Bryant Halliday... which is strange because he is not in the film. The production company credit was orginally "Anglo-Amalgamated" - and on the American print it's listed as "Crackers Gone Wild". A scene where Haliday and Sandra Dorne leave her dressing room and go into a side room to have sex was cut from the American print. Instead, we are treated to six minutes of kittens playing with a ball of yarn. In the European version there is a scene on stage where Haliday hypnotizes a woman from the audience into performing a striptease which ends with her topless. In the American version a raccoon in the corner at the nightclub gets his head caught in a cookie jar and fumbles around under patrons' legs. Also in the European version, Dorne turns in her sleep to reveal a breast - but in the American version she sits up in a baby-doll nightgown and makes sure her Bible and gun are under her pillow. As Hugo creeps into the bedroom to stab Dorne in the European print, we again see her exposed breast... but the murder is off camera. In the American version the dummy rips off Dorne's head and dances in a fountain of her blood - but luckily the breast is covered. Sylvester calls his pudgy middle-aged colleague at a Berlin hotel, who is accompanied in bed by a young girl playing with her hair.  In the American print she is wearing a bra and a see-through negligee... while in European print HE is wearing a bra and a see-through negligee. The original title for the European release of the film was Devil Dog, but a lawsuit brought by the Little Debbie manufacturers - who had a popular snack cake with that name - forced them to change the name for American audiences. The British Version cut the sequence featuring the forbidden dance... The Twist. Devil Doll was in fact based on a short story written by Shari Lewis. The Great Vorelli (Bryant Haliday) mastered the art of transferring souls into inanimate objects. Unfortunately he was unable to accomplish this for the film's cast. Vorelli runs into rich, beautiful Marianne Horn (Yvonne Romain) and seeks to hypnotize her into believing she is in a good movie. William Sylvester plays the reporter (and boyfriend) of Romain who's writing a travel piece about smoking and talking across Europe. It was a longstanding rule that all foreign made films that were to be imported to the US were required to have an American journalist character that does absolutely nothing to advance the story. This was the first live action English Horror Film shot in "Supermarionation." Ventriloquist dummies used in the film were displayed at the premiere screening - but they got up and left 15 minutes into the film. William Sylvester employs an acting style called "the amnesia technique" that allows him to go from Gorgo to Devil Doll to 2001: A Space Odyssey and not be remembered from one film to the next. The Horseshoe Crab has eyes in its tail. Unfortunately the horror of Devil Doll has been overshadowed by the classic "Ventriloquist's Dummy" episode of Family Matters (1989) in which they made a dummy of Urkel. (shudder) The false beard in this film allowed actor Bryant Haliday to be cast two years later as the globe-trotting single father on Johnny Quest. Devil Doll's story of an evil ventriloquist controlling the mind of a dummy has inspired many other films, TV shows, and presidential administrations. Oddly enough, "Tickle Me Hugo" was the surprise must-have Christmas gift of 1964. Before Yvonne Romain falls under the hypnotist's spell, she claims she doesn't know how to dance - and under trance she proves it by doing The Twist! Devil Doll was filmed in England, which is the reason the Beatles came to America. Yvonne Romaine's character went through many name changes in earlier drafts of the script, such as Yvonne Iceberg, Yvonne Web's Wonder, and Yvonne Butter-Lettuce. Bryant Halliday, who was the Devil Doll's dominator Vorelli, later became co-founder of Janus Films, 'home owner' of The Criterion Collection - which made millions of dummies by Laserdiscs. This film has many tight shots showing the actors in close-up so that it would play for television... just as stale and boring as it did for the cinema. Because of budget limitations, all of the puppets in Devil Doll were made from Bisquick. Director David Lynch saw this movie and found it odd. It took six of Europe's finest sausage packers to get Vorelli's blonde assistant into her showgirl leotard. The Great Vorelli hypnotizes a man form the audience into believing he is held hostage with a loaded gun to his head. He begs, prays, sweats, weeps and eventually cries out as he is forced to imagine a finger pulling the trigger and to anticipate the bullet crashing through his skull. Subsequently, the nightclub stocked spare pairs of underwear for patrons who participate in the stage shows. It's hard for us to imagine how a creepy ventriloquist who has the demeaning and dark act performs in front of sold-out crowds in Britain... since humiliating dummies and audience members would not become as popular in America until 30 years later, when The Jerry Springer Show premiered. Devil Doll is really slow and tedious and has no sense of direction, and it's really slow and has no sense of - Wait, I already said that. Uh, hold on. Did I say it was slow? To make Hugo the dummy truly horrifying, special effects wizards modeled his face on the unholy spawn of Larry Storch and Ernest Borgnine. To punish Hugo, now trapped in a doll's body, the evil Vorelli denies him ham, Christmas presents and shiksas. Most famously associated with the final segment of Dead Of Night, killer dummies have also popped up in films as diverse as Magic, Dollman vs. the Demonic Toys, Rambo, Red Heat, Cold as Ice, and The Adventures of Ford Fairlane. Devil Doll won the coveted Oscar for most absurd eyebrows in a motion picture. To save money on false eyelashes, fat fuzzy caterpillars dipped in tar were used. A production grant was given to the film Devil Doll by the Milkfed German Prostitute Preservation Board. Vorelli's delivery in Devil Doll is so monotone that portions of his dialogue are allowed to be played as an alternative to the Emergency Broadcast System test signal. You could fill the crankcase of a Volkswagen ten times with the amount of oil produced from Vorelli's face in this film. In Seattle, it's now illegal to air Devil Doll - the result of an incident in 1997 when it allegedly pushed 11,000 more of their depressed and rain-weary citizens to commit suicide. Director Tod Browning' was so angry at the confusion between his film The Devil-Doll (1945) and Devil Doll that he shrunk the entire cast and crew into tiny slaves to do his bidding. This movie was followed by the sequels Devil Dolls Are Go!, The Devil Dolls take Manhattan! and Beyond the Valley of the Devil Dolls.

It is this kind of energy that keeps Columbian coffee harvesters working day and night.  You can get your copy of CreatureScape #6 which features all this and more (video clips!) of Mr. Lobo.  And, you don't have to feel guilty (at least about this) because 30% of our sales will go to the American Red Cross to relieve the Gulf Coast states.

8/30/05 Update

Reprinted with kind permission from Countgore.com...
 

Something Worth Howling About

Gather 'round The Gallows again, my fellow pasty-faced Morlocks, and allow me to direct your glassy-eyed stares from your computer screen to that flickering box in the other corner of the room. That's right - I'm talking about your television. Your friend the TV is feelin' a little ignored right now, so why not go over and wipe her screen, tweak her knobs, push her buttons, and show her a little attention? Hey, you could even break out the "rabbit ears" for old times' sake.

What's that you say? The TV is getting a little played? Stale? Just the same-old same old? Count Gore (who will henceforth be referred to as The Naked Naysayer) and I had a short conversation in a cheap hotel room recently (don't ask), about what's on the tube nowadays. It went vaguely like this...

The Naked Naysayer: "Blah, blah... The Dead Zone... blah, blah, blah... Lost... blah, blah, blah... Desperate Housewives. Blah."

Me: (In my best backwater voice) "I like Dawg Duh Bounty Hunter. He's goood people."

The Naked Naysayer: (Throwing up his hands and rolling his eyes) "You always did have terrible taste."

Hmm... I supposed that story says more about my slipping grip on reality than whatever point I was trying to make. Where was I? Oh yeah - MR. LOBO! A couple of years back I ranted incoherently about Cinema Insomnia, a laid-back horror host show from California, hosted by laid-back horror host Mr. Lobo. Back then he was this strange man in a dark room talking to a plant and showing bad movies on cable access. Now, he is a nationally syndicated strange man in a dark room talking to a plant and showing bad movies on the UATV network! Hey, it's time to love your TV again!

Mr. Lobo is the tapped heir-apparent to the Bay Area's legendary Bob Wilkins, with a wry delivery and understated style that screams the universal wisdom: "If you want to get someone's attention... whisper." Our host relaxes in his rocker on a set that is any Gothic minimalist's dream; the simple, darkly lit lair of a psychointellecual film-freak. His catchphrase: "They're not bad movies, just misunderstood." His sidekick, a potted plant he calls Miss Mittens. His forte: pointing out the absurd through subtle sarcasm, commercial parodies, and an eye for producing the kind of retro television that will never go out of style.

Mr. Lobo has been stretching the legs of his show across the country for a while now via The Horror Host Underground www.horrorhosts.com, self-syndication and other outlets - generally pleading and whining for attention in a way that only horror hosts and pathetic stray puppies can. Well, it looks like all that shameless self-promotion has taken our buddy to a place where many horror hosts have gone before - and many wish we could return to - the land of UHF! That's right, even those of you without cable or a dish can tune into Cinema Insomnia, if you live in one of the select areas lucky enough to have a UATV affiliate. To find out if Mr. Lobo is gracing your local airwaves, or how to bring him to your town if he isn't already there, check out: www.cinemainsomnia.com!

'Til next we swing here on The Gallows, don't take life too seriously, because you know life is laughing at your expense!

   Your ol' pal,

   Ghastlee

10/03/05
 (This appeared in the 9/29/05 issue of Sacramento News & Review. Thank you!)
 

Best Locally Produced TV Show
(that you can't watch in Sacramento)

Cinema Insomnia

Perhaps Cinema Insomnia has received a supernatural infusion from the undead characters featured on this B-movie show helmed by Sacramento's own horror host Mr. Lobo. Despite being killed off by KXTV Channel 10 after one season in 2002, the show has resurrected itself for several more seasons. Featuring beloved cult movies like Night of the Living Dead and The Seventh Seal framed by original skits using local settings and actors, Cinema Insomnia currently is broadcast weekly on UPN stations throughout the Eastern and Southern United States, as well as nationwide on cable's UATV. Mr. Lobo's tireless marketing efforts are paying off, but it's hard to enjoy his success when we still can't watch the show in Sacramento. It seems our local networks prefer late-night infomerical marathons over Lobo's original, locally produced and nationally successful television show. Kudos to Mr. Lobo for continuing to put Sacramento's legendary geek culture on the national radar each week. We're ready to heap similar praise on any Northern California station willing to take a chance on a local ghoul making good. www.cinemainsomnia.com.

MONSTER NEWS (July 2005)

Carrying The Torch

by Jace Whitman

In October 2003, I had the good fortune to be able to do some live makeup FX for The Trash Film Orgy, a Sacramento tradition that is a midnight summer film festival that features great horror/ cult films at the Crest Theater. My job was to come up with three deaths, performed live and on-stage. I’ve loved makeup FX since I was a kid. I’ve made myself and friends into ghouls and other creatures, but I’d never done anything like this. I volunteered just because it sounded like fun, and that’s exactly what it was.

I had a three night gig for a mini film fest for Halloween. Each night I had a different death, a dismemberment, a scalping, and a poor ol’timer having his face sliced off. Each night I came as a variation of a zombie pimp character, with a full face latex appliance. I met Mr. Lobo the first night, while I was having a smoke in front of the box office. I knew Mr. Lobo had a horror show, but I’d never seen it. We struck up a conversation about the night’s festivities, and got into a discussion about Bob Wilkins, a mutual hero.

Mr. Lobo had to make a run to his work, a local network channel, and asked if I wanted to ride along. As we rode to the station, we talked monsters, and about Bob Wilkins’ rocking chair. It ends up that Mr. Lobo had just done a show with Bob Wilkins as a guest, filmed in a local cemetery. I was impressed by this, but unfortunately I still haven’t seen that episode. Mr. Lobo showed me around the station, and even introduced me to the local anchorman who was on set about to go on air. I kept forgetting about my zombie makeup until someone reacted. This was a fun and memorable time, and it felt great to be around people with similar interests.

By chance, I ran into Mr. Lobo in a coffee shop a few weeks later, said hello. It took me a moment to realize he had no idea who I was, as I’d been in three different makeups for the fest.

Shortly after, I was invited by Mr. Lobo to do a makeup on an actor, turning him into Tor Johnson for the Cinema Insomnia screening of Plan 9 from Outer Space. I also reported on the show for The Monster News, and it was a blast. I’d seen a couple shows at this point, and watching Cinema Insomnia live was a unique and fun experience.

Mr. Lobo’s Cinema Insomnia for the uninitiated, is a late-night movie show that airs bizarre films, mainly horror and sci-fi. Mr. Lobo hosts sitting in a familiar rocking chair, with minimal sets. His intros and skits are entertaining, and he has some nice interviews appearing in various episodes.

Doing makeup for TFO was a treat, but helping out with Mr. Lobo’s live show was more special to me. Helping out a horror host made me think again of Bob Wilkins and John Stanley, and how I would have felt when I was younger had I been able to work with either of them on a show.

I have a lot of respect for people like Mr. Lobo, who has put together a solid show, and is relentless in the pursuit of having it seen by as many people as possible. I love the thought that somewhere out there are young (and old) minds just waiting to be warped by Cinema Insomnia.

In the time since, I’ve seen Mr. Lobo help introduce films at the Trash Film Orgy, and have seen him keep his cool as well as his wit during some very challenging situations. The TFO audience can be pretty wild at times. They heckle, yell, and occasionally throw stuff at people on the stage. In spite of this, Mr. Lobo is always in a pro and does a great job.

I was lucky enough to also attend Mr. Lobo's showing of House on Haunted Hill, that was done in collaboration with the Monster Club. It was great to see Cheryl and Mr. Lobo working together on an event, and I hope there will be more soon.

As fate would have it, Cinema Insomnia is not currently on the air in Sacramento. It’s ironic that CI is now nationally syndicated, but not in his (or my) hometown. I am sure that will change soon and I look forward to watching more episodes. Mr. Lobo continues to carry the torch previously carried by Bob Wilkins and John Stanley, two of my childhood idols, and I’m thankful for that. Keep up the good work Mr. Lobo, you are appreciated.

From the Amercan River Current

(October 2004)

SCI FILM REVIEWS CINEMA INSOMNIA: MONSTER FROM A PREHISORIC PLANET

(August 2004)

The DVD

The Cinema Insomnia DVD is about the only thing that salvages this movie for me. MONSTER FROM A PREHISTORIC PLANET is also available from other companies (see links below), but none of them come with Mr. Lobo and company. Mr. Lobo, for those of you who may not be familiar with him, is a Sacramento-based horror host that may soon be coming to a cable network near you. If you do not have the good fortune to have him on the airwaves in your area, you can now enjoy him on DVD-R by visiting cinemainsomnia.com. I have several his DVDs, but this one is one of the most entertaining. Not only do you get Mr. Lobo's hilarious wraparounds, you get a healthy heaping of retro commercials (e.g. "Large Shogun Warriors and Godzilla", "Godzilla Board Game") and lots of trailers both old and new (e.g. EARTHQUAKE, THE LAND UNKNOWN, GODZILLA KING OF THE MONSTERS, TREMORS, FLASH GORDON). Some funny highlights include guest appearances by other horror ‘hosts' like Miss Shankenstein ("You watch me cause me have boobies") and Mr. Lobo learning to hula. Mothra's Peanut Sisters even make a guest appearance! While low-budget, Mr. Lobo has a great sense of comic timing and some very funny writing. In my opinion, this is the ONLY way to see this "tiki-tainted poopoo platter of tropical terror" a.k.a. MONSTER FROM A PREHISTORIC PLANET.

One note in terms of quality: my DVD-R does get a bit pixelated in a few scenes, but it's watchable. Mr. Lobo may have been able to improve this in later pressings (e-mail and ask him).

The Final Word

The Japanese monster movie does not sink much lower than this (the Koreans came pretty close though). It is not a movie for the faint of heart, especially taken straight up without anything to dilute it. However, under the right circumstances (hosted by Mr. Lobo for example), MONSTER FROM A PREHISTORIC PLANET can be pretty damn entertaining.

(... and this is another interview with Mr. Lobo which appeared in the May 2003 issue of Monster News celebrating "Mr. Lobo and his Late Night Movie SpookShow," which they sponsored. Thank you!)
 

Monster News Interviews Mr. Lobo

MN: We're catching up with Mr. Lobo, the enigmatic horror host of Cinema Insomnia -
ML: Mr. Lobo is more than just a horror host.
MN: I'm sorry. How would you describe yourself?
ML: Oh, this is your interview. Mr. Lobo just wants it to be understood that we show all sorts of films on Cinema Insomnia, not just horror films. I also do live appearances... I'm actually trying to get away from the horror host thing.
MN: Really?
ML: I mean, the whole thing is kind of stupid, if you think about it.
MN: (pause) What?
ML: When was the last time you saw a movie that was driven by the human experience, instead of special effects or rubber monsters? How juvenile is that? I've got to stumble out in my clown suit and entertain the rubes with pie-in-the pants-shenanigans.
MN: You are aware that I'm recording this -
ML: Oh. Uh... Of course, I'm kidding. I love horror movies! Boo! That was, of course, an elaborate prank at your expense... in the proud tradition of horror hosts. We love to pull the dress over our audience's heads.
MN: Should I come back at another time?
ML: No, no. No. Don't leave. I like hearing the sound of another person's voice.
MN: Yes. Well -
ML: There's so much I want to tell you. We just wrapped our third season, which is actually our first syndicated season. 28 programs full of vintage commercials and monster movie trailers... outrageous skits. Our flagship station is KEJB UPN-43 in Monroe, Louisiana, which also services El Dorado, Arkansas. And a complete season was aired in Virginia Beach, Virginia. The response has been very positive. We will be back on the air in Virginia this fall. We're negotating with a bigtime television distributor that has many shows on the air, right now, and strong ties to the affiliates here in Sacramento, the San Francisco Bay Area and Washington State. We also have pockets of resistance in several states, where old episodes are still airing on public access - oh, and let's not forget that for the past year, shows were screened in the Motorola Theatre at the South Florida Science Center in Palm Beach. The museum curator, Dave Baker, has gone so far as to share our show with a team of UFO researchers -
MN: That's all interesting, but -
ML: I got a letter from a fan, a Monster News reader, from Iowa. It was the saddest thing I've ever read in my life. You could almost feel the tears on the page. 'We don't have any horror hosts in Iowa, Mr. Lobo. Can I join your fan club?' And his story is not unique. We have been handily selling DVDs of our program, and fan club memberships, and t-shirts, to Cinsomniacs in New Jersey, Utah, Connecticut, Michigan, Ohio, Maryland, Tennessee, Texas, Oregon -
MN: Look, this is really more information than anyone could possibly want or care to hear -
ML: Yeah, those places aren't that interesting. But what is really interesting is how I, Mr. Lobo, have singlehandedly revived the horror genre. How else do you think a remake of "Dawn of the Dead" would knock "The Passion of the Christ" out of the number-one spot at the box office? Huh?
MN: Okay, you're putting me on, now. Did Cheryl put you up to this?
ML: Who's Cheryl?
MN: You wrote the foreward to her book!
ML: You know, I write a lot of forewards. You're going to have to be more specific.
MN: Monster Movie Memories - From Movie Palace to Drive-In - A fun and enlightening look at favorite monster movies of the 30's through 60's, the actors and filmmakers who made them happen, and the history of movie palaces, drive-ins, horror film trivia, and more?
ML: (pause) Doesn't ring a bell.
MN: (opening book) But I have a copy right here... and you say that Cheryl Duran should be declared an honorary horror host.
ML: I never would have said that. There are too many horror hosts out there already.
MN: But -
ML: I think there should be an American Idol of horror hosts, to thin the ranks. Oh - and speaking of American, did I mention that I assisted the producers of a new documentary about horror hosts? It's called American Scary and it's due for release later this year. I also assisted in the making of a film called The Midnight of My Life, directed by Bob Moricz, which will premiere at the Crest Theater in Sacramento later this year. I also cameoed in a short film by Christian Gaunt called Crazy Trek, and I'm currently assisting with another documentary. It's about Criswell -
MN: I really don't care, and I'm beginning to think this was a bad idea.
ML: Thanks to my movie work, I now have not one but two listings in the Internet Movie Database. I'm glad to be finally recognized by www.imdb.com -
MN: I can't believe Cheryl sent me to talk to a self-absorbed -
ML: I love Cheryl. You know, I wrote the foreward to her latest book, Monster Movie Memories - From Movie Palace to Drive-In, a fun and enlightening look at favorite monster movies of the 30's through 60's, The actors and filmmakers who made them hap-
MN: Goodbye, Mr. Lobo.
ML: But wait. Cheryl and The Monster Club are producing a live William Castle-style SpookShow at the Crest, midnight on May 15. We're going to show House of Haunted Hill, we're going to have registered nurses handing out diapers to the weak-bladdered, we're going to be handing out Blood-O-Vision glasses for the strong of heart, and Wuss-O-Vision glasses for everyone else - oh, and did I mention that we'll be taping that night, and using part of the live show during the upcoming season? And October's a really big month for us -
MN: You don't say.
ML: Yes. Not only will Mr. Lobo be participating in Horror-Host-Palooza again, at the Parkway Theater in Oakland, but I'll also be presenting at the Trash Film Orgy Halloween - come to think of it, I'll also be onstage during the six-week summer festival as well. But there's one event that has deep personal significance for Mr. Lobo, because I will be coordinating, alongside the Church of Ed Wood, a film and music festival called EdWoodstock, October 17 at the Crest Theatre. As you know, Mr. Lobo is a legally canonized saint in the Church of Ed Wood - the patron saint of horror hosts and insomniacs. If ever you can't sleep, just light a candle next to a picture of Mr. Lobo, or just turn on your TV.
MN: Are you through yet?
ML: Oh, I'm not through. I'm just getting warmed up. Now - Where are you going? You forgot your coat. Come back here... Well, be careful backing out, there's glass in the driveway... I guess I'll just mail you your tape recorder, when I'm finished. Gee, I hope there's enough tape left so I can sufficiently -
(click)

(... and this is from a review by Tor Hershman which appeared December 28, 2003, on EdWoodsHolyHaven, a Yahoo! Group. Thank you!)
 

In The Name Of The Government Of France,
I Order You To Say, LAAAADDDDYYYY !

A review of Mr. Lobo's "Cinema Insomnia," by TOR.
Firstly, Mr. Lobo conducting business while on-air is most unprofessional :).
Mr. Lobo also states, betwixt 17.4 & 19.5 seconds into the clip , and I quote "....let me call you, back."
However, does Mr. Lobo call this person, Back? Neither Mr. nor Ms. Back is so dubbed upon the caller.
Well, this IS a minor, hopefully not coal, error.
Well, is the spring that has, allegedly, curative attributes known as a Well Well?
I think knot, but let us not bark about it, so on with the critiquing of Mr. Lobo & "Cinema Insomnia."

Mr. Lobo's catch phrase `These films aren't bad, just misunderstood' is a Horror Host classic line. This should be in the Halls of Horror Host Fame.
In fact, it could well be (which is not a healthy honey maker) THE best Horror Host catch phrase.
A catch phrase, in and of itself, surpassing even the legendary Ghoulardi's "Stay sick" and on at least a par with Mr. Sterling's "You have now entered......The Twilight Zone."

Having a horticultural co-host is a fine concept. This will not only secure many a vegan viewer but also *********socially arousing political reference deleted*********.

Holy crap, I saw this film, it DOES STINK!
Cooooooool logo, I like the test patterns, in the corners.
Mr. Lobo has a superbly grand resonance and an excellent camera persona.
The smoking soup mug, a very nice touch, as is the slight head-twist.
Mr. Lobo instructs the kiddies well with his Halloween advice, with an exceptionally well drawn visual aid as well, AND there's that cool head-twist again.
I wonder if the dude in the movie had a nice trip?
Ahhhh, traveling in fall via falling, what a fall-guy (somewhat reminiscent of Falstaff) {I hope I get no fallout from that remark}.
Wifey and I were just speaking of the proper use of a rubber chicken just this week.
Mr. Lobo's doth employ of the polymer poulet is ponderously proper, most amusing.
Nice oath, that delivery could scare an average person.
AAAAAAAAAA, girl done did turn to caramelized skeleton, Mr. Lobo dines upon a caramel apple, QUITE jocular.
TOR's final score for "Cinema Insomnia": 97.49% - "Cinema Insomnia," starring Mr. Lobo, brought forth laughter; "Cinema Insomnia" is a must view for all true fans of Horror, SciFi, and Film á la Fantastique.

05/11/04 WORMWOOD CHRONICLES

You're Not Dreaming...
You're talking to Mr. Lobo
By Sir Lawrence Alegdrop

Mr. Lobo runs and hosts a horror movie show in syndication throughout parts of the United States called “Cinema Insomnia.” After having seen several episodes, I talked about his show on a science fiction movie message board (www.scifilm.org), when who should reply to my messages, but Mr. Lobo himself. Eventually, we exchanged information, which led to this telephone conversation between myself (Sir Lawrence Alegdrop) and Mr. Lobo.

WORMWOOD CHRONICLES: I want to thank you for giving me some of your time today. So how has the show been doing lately, Mr. Lobo?

MISTER LOBO: It’s a pleasure to talk with you. The show is doing great. We just finished what has to be the most involved set of wraps in the history of the show. It took four days of shooting, which is the most we have ever done. We did sort of a George Lucas inspired theme where we went to different planets for our vignettes. We had things like the yard sale planet and the planet of poorly used stock footage. It was pretty involved from a shooting standpoint.

WC: What movie was it for?

ML: These will be for the movie Star Crash, a science fiction movie that kind of ripped off of Star Wars.

WC: Let me start by asking where do you get the movies you air on your show?

ML: That’s a good question because most outlets that offer this type of stuff simply take it from videos. We actually get it from garbage cans, quite literally. When TV went to video much of the 16 millimeter film went into the trash. Then film collectors like Scott Moon and Bob Macaben made it their life’s work to recover these films and they like what I do so they lend me copies to air. I used to work for Scott’s magazine, Planet X and I had already done live shows for him in bars and night clubs. But they buy prints of public domain films for around $700 to $1,000 for a 16 millimeter print for me to air.

ML: How did you get started doing “Cinema Insomnia,” the horror movie show in which you host?

ML: I was working for an ABC affiliate here in Sacramento, Calif. The affiliate was airing movies at 3:00 a.m. and having four and six minute commercial interruptions, four and six minute commercial interruptions. Let me say that again, four and six minute commercial interruptions. And they had no real advertisers, they were mostly public service announcements. So we suggested doing wraps for the movies.

WC: What kinds of movies were they showing? Were they horror and science fiction movies or just whatever?

ML: They were just showing whatever they could get ahold of to fill the air space. One movie they aired was They Made Me a Criminal. Have you seen it?

WC: Yes, John Garfield and the East Side Kids. That’s a great movie.

ML: That’s the one. We had fun with it. We pretty much made fun of the amount of times someone said “sucker.” So whenever we heard the line I’d come out with a sucker.

WC: So when you started making the wraparounds, where did you come up with the idea of the Mr. Lobo character?

ML: The beginning of Mr. Lobo was a comic strip I used to draw for my high school newspaper. The strip was of me, sitting there in my suit watching movies. This was how I wrote a review. I’d draw some of the movie, then draw myself tearing it apart.

WC: Are you still on in Sacramento?

ML: Unfortunately, not. After 18 weeks, management decided not to do the show anymore. It got good ratings, but they just didn’t “get it.” They thought that stuff was small market, and they had a corporate image to maintain. I really feel that if the show had done poorly it would have stayed because once they started getting calls and mail about it that was when they took it off the air. And most of the executives had never even seen the show.

WC: So what did you do then?

ML: Well, when I had the show at the ABC affiliate they supplied everything, the audio guy, cameras, cameramen, everything was at my disposal. Now I had to figure out how to make the show without all of those resources. Plus I was still working for the ABC affiliate, so it meant the end of my job.

WC: Somewhere around this time is when you wound up in my area of Virginia Beach, right? How did that come about?

ML: Yes. I got a call from Bill Gontz in Virginia, who owned Easychair Productions. It was an advertising agency, that also did a high school sports show, a music video show, and he wanted to do a hosted horror movie show. He was also a big Dr. Madblood fan (the hosted horror movie show of legend in Virginia), and he felt there was still something in hosted horror movie shows. I said I don’t what I can do, but I’d like to make this show for Virginia. That was how my relationship with Cox Communications came about. That was a surprise for me. It took about 13 weeks to get any feedback from the fans then all of a sudden everything came in.

WC: Was there any animosity between you and Dr. Madblood with two hosted horror movie shows in the same market?

ML: I suspect there may have been. I hold no animosity toward Madblood at all. I know exactly where he’s coming from. But for several weeks we were showing the same movies, Carnival of Souls for example. So we looked to find the most off the wall movies we could to get away from that. That was when we did Gamera, Super Monster and Superwheels. I thought that even Dr. Madblood would not show these movies.

WC: I’ve seen those episodes, and the wraps are hysterical, probably the best wraps you’ve ever done. But the movies are probably the worst you’ve ever shown.

ML: Yes, we like to think of ourselves as hamburger helper. We make bad movies better. Once we decide to show a movie if it is really, really bad we work really hard to make it even better. And we have to work REALLY hard on the bad ones.

WC? How was it to be suddenly putting the show together for another audience?

ML: In the heat of the moment, we were just putting out fires in making the show for Virginia. I had never written a TV show before, ever. I totally have complete respect for what these people do. I had just done Sacramento and a few public access stations, and at some point people start communicating with you about the show. That started happening, and we weren’t even on UPN yet, we were just making the shows for Virginia. So I wasn’t even on in my hometown. I was emotionally moved by how forgiving people were. We were just in limbo.

WC: You mentioned UPN, where were you on and how did that come about?

ML: Well, for about a year and a half we were putting these shows together for public access stations in Milwaukee and Florida, where we were running episodes in a theater at a science museum. I really felt confident we were doing something well. Then Louisiana called from a UPN station and saw something in me they liked. That is KEJB 43. At this point they were still building the transmitter. There was a chance they were going on the air on Halloween, but they didn’t have anything to air. FCC rules said they had to have something on the air. I sent some episodes, some aired. In the end I signed a 28 show commitment. In the two prior years we made 18 episodes per year, so this was a bit more work.

WC: How has that helped get your product out there to the public?

ML: We’re on 100 stations in the Southeast today, and we’re trying to get more affiliates involved. Also the B-Mania cable network sponsored a live show and wanted me to host some of their programs. I think it’s a case of people not seeing what they want on TV so they’re making it themselves. On the other hand, when we made the deal with UPN we decided we can’t ask someone to pay for what we’re giving away to other outlets. So here in Sacramento, we’re still not on.

WC: Do you find it difficult coming up with material?

ML: You know, it’s difficult to do satire. People expect a horror hosts to be weird, irreverent. I think it’s ideal for most humor. You’re giving them the material for humor then you have to allow them to “get it.”

WC: How do you put together each show?

ML: We make 22 wraps for each show, and there are 12 commercial breaks. We do eight minutes of show and two minute wraps. We write a show on a weekend and shoot it on Sunday and some on Monday much at my own cost. The Gamera episode was written and shot all in one day. This season is a little different because we want to get them all done in advance.

WC: Kind of like an old Corman film.

ML: Yes, something like that. I have a deeper appreciation for these guys now.

WC: How much does it cost to produce each show?

ML: The average cost is about $43 per show, and I get the films borrowed from collections.

WC: Where do you shoot the episodes so cheap?

ML: In my backyard there’s a small shack where the show is filmed. It has one window. It kind of looks like a fifth grader’s picture of a house. It’s about the size of a two car garage. Inside there’s a black curtain stapled to the wall. The lighting is made out of pool skimmers. In the show you just see the black wall, but in reality all the other walls are filled with junk; models, mattresses, it’s like a junkyard with a black curtain.

WC: What’s all the junk for?

ML: We make the props right on the spot. We needed a space periscope once, so we made it right on the spot.

WC: Tell me about some of the people who are also on the show.

ML: Well, we have Lady Skankenstein. It was tough to find a female character, but she “gets it.” She was recommended to me by a friend. She was a stripper by night and a college student by day. Her first episode was Carnival of Souls. I had a box full of clothes for her to wear, things like bicycle handlebars coming out of her head.

WC: How about behind the scenes?

ML: It’s been very hard work because there’s been a revolving door of people who’ve helped and had to go back to their real lives. Ken Waller directs and edits now. Ken did not start out as a friend. He was introduced to me. He had done “Shock Theater” in the 1980s, but was never picked up. He was a big fan of horror movies. There’s so many people who don’t ask for anything and give so much. You just don’t know what to say to them. But no one has been there since the beginning but me.

WC: Were there any nights that didn’t go so well?

ML: The night that never ended was the night we did Dick Tracy Meets Greusome. Lady Skankenstein lost part of her costume, it was locked in the studio. We kept forgetting things and were driving back and forth because it was on location, and we wound up spending $40 in gas. We didn’t get out until 4 a.m. and Skankenstein had school in the morning.

WC: What is the status of “Cinema Insomnia” today?

ML: We’re finally airing in Louisiana since mid-February. We’re on prime time right after “The Outer Limits.” We’ve gotten lots of positive feedback. It also airs in cable outlets in Arkansas, so we’re back on legit TV. We’re also getting calls from publications. There’s a real hunger for this type of thing. The time is right and people are getting into this type of programming.

WC: And how about the future?

ML: Next season we’ll have a good headstart, and we’re hoping to find prints that are in better quality. We have one episode with the movie Ancient Astronauts where we’ve wrapped around a documentary. The film has Rod Serling looking at various things around the world and talking about how they could be proof of alien beings having visited the Earth. Toward the end we have a wrap of us examining a Christmas tree and we say it’s proof of alien interference. We also have a couple of investors who are stepping up and will put tens of thousands of dollars to promote the show. This will be a very big push for Mr. Lobo.

WC: Finally, I have to ask, just who is Mr. Lobo?

ML: Well, being a horror host has always been my dream, but Mr. Lobo is a character, not myself. Mr. Lobo is my prop. In my life I have published comics, done theater, wrote for a TV show, made trading cards. They were all interesting things but none of them ever had a face to it. Mr. Lobo is a conduit. He connects everything I used to do and people can see where it’s coming from. Things have been a lot easier since I’m selling myself instead of something else.

 

(... and this is the B Monster's plug for "Mr. Lobo and His Shocking Midnite Movie SpookShow", which appeared in the May 2004 "B MONSTER BULLETIN". Thank you!)

Capital Spook Show

Syndicated TV horror host Mr. Lobo will bring his "Shocking Midnite Movie Spookshow" to the Golden State's capital, Sacramento, Calif., this May 15. The ghoulish gadabout who hosts "Cinema Insomnia" will be presenting William Castle's classic "House on Haunted Hill" at the Crest Theatre. This sinister soiree is being held to salute the release of themonsterclub.com's recent tome, "Monster Movie Memories," which, it just so happens, features a foreword by Mr. Lobo. "Mad monsters stealing girls from the audience! A lucky audience member will win a free dead body and an autographed copy of 'Monster Movie Memories!' Blood-o-Vision glasses will drench everything you see in crimson gore!" Somewhere, Castle is smiling. For more info visit: http://www.cinemainsomnia.com
and/or:
themonsterclub.com
And, of course, let 'em know the B Monster sent you!

04/28/04
 (This is Tor Hershman's review of our "A Bucket of Blood" episode, which appeared in the Yahoo! Group "edwoodsholyhaven" on April 19. Thank you!)

"Bucket of Blood," pail of platelet, can of corpuscle, call the film what you will, Cinema Insomnia's Mr. Lobo presents a most entertaining program of priceless parodies, surreal satires, outlandish out-takes, tremendous trailers, and comical commercials; all of this, and more, placed throughout a masterpiece of macabre movie making, Roger Corman's [The creator of the timeless cult classic "Little Shop of Horrors] "Bucket of Blood."

Mr. Lobo's presentation is a delight from the intro, with wonderfully well done special effects, to Mr. Lobo's warm & wacky presentation of his tremendously talented thespians, at the show's outro.

What can you expect?

SEE WALTER PAISLEY BATTLE AN UNDERCOVER NARCOTICS AGENT.
(Will he kill it, with a skillet?)

SEE THE VELVETY & VIVACIOUS VIXEN, CHERRY MALONE, ACHIEVE COFFEE-GASM.

HEAR MR. LOBO READ A POEM (Heathcliff, Heathcliff, No one should / Terrorize the neighborhood/.....).

SEE ENTIRE CITIES DESTROYED.

SEE MR. LOBO, who proclaims his love of the counter culture, SENTENCED TO WORK THE, coffee, COUNTER (Perhaps the irony that helped bring about the
iron & irony rich' "Customer's Blend.")

SEE A MAN ACHIN', WITH CLAY &
A MAN CLAYED, AFTER ACHIN'.

SEE A GALAXY OF GORGEOUS GIRLS, IN THEIR NIGHTIES, PILLOW FIGHT.

HEAR THE DEVIL PROCLAIM "The ladies at the Trash Film Festival are outta control."

SEE & HEAR THE WORLD'S SMALLEST PREACHER LADY WILDLY PRAISE & SING.

SEE THE 4-H CLUB & DISNEY SAVE THE WORLD FROM ATOMIC DESTRUCTION.

HEAR REVEREND STEVE MAKE THE COOLEST SOUND IN TV HISTORY (In the role of "Angry Costumer disin' Mr. Lobo").

SEE BILL DANA GET SOUSED.

SEE MR. LOBO's SOCK GARTERS
(Perhaps the screen's most disturbing moment).

SEE BEATNIK POET, MAXWELL, IN FULL TUX AND SANDALS
(Perhaps the screen's most heart touching moment).

All this & MUCH MORE! Perhaps the World's Greatest, Time Warping, Gut Busting, Libido Laminating video presentation in the annals of entertainment history.
It is a major hoot.
Enjoyable to watch over and over again.

To be en-darkened more, visit Mr. Lobo's Cinema Insomnia on the web. You'll be glad you did.
http://www.cinemainsomnia.com/

From the July 2002 CI Program Guide
 

"To Be Watching, Perchance Not To Be In Dream"

How clear the recollection - of being much shorter, and with that unique late-night excitement, waiting for the words...

Gramma was on the couch, snoring almost inaudibly. We had drugged her sassafras tea with tryptophan, as we did each Saturday night - in order to stay up and crowd around the blurry cathode-ray tube, squinting at six diagonal inches of bohemian delight.

The jaunty tune filled our grade-school dreams with sophisticated adult pleasures that were relentlessly swell. And that unmistakable logo, with its accessible, hand-lettered title! Seven syllables that changed our world. We'd shush each other furiously. Quiet, he's going to say it...

It was always such an exciting moment. Each time, an odd uncertainty came over me, making me shiver with the wordless implications. I thought I was as awake as I could be - until Mr. Lobo told me I wasn't dreaming.

He was the worldly, tolerant uncle I knew I'd never know.
 

His disdain for rock 'n roll music was the first dark cloud to occlude the weekly enlightment I had learned to savor. But he had earned my trust, throughout the turbulent years of boyhood. It seemed best to suspend judgement until I saw more of the great wide world. A sly reference to the Tonkin Gulf made no sense to me at the time, but the following months displayed his uncanny foresight.

His interest in the space race was infectious. His enigmatic jokes about cyclamates and sonic booms only piqued my curiosity. When I cautiously lowered myself into my first hot tub, Mr. Lobo was present from his detached dimension behind the glass. From him, I learned not only how to Whip Inflation Now, but also how to mince and puree it. The authoritative presence was a trusty comfort as a contract player became a television star, and a governor... and the leader of this great land. It was very early morning in America, and the parade of mediocre films pressed on as if it was never going to stop.

His poise was a calming influence as the Berlin Wall came down, and the number of S&L failures went up. A new generation discovered his inscrutable wisdom as VCR's became commonplace in the average suburban home. Not even the advent of the three-point shot circle could dislodge him from his nondescript rocking chair...
 

I am an old man now. And yet this host, a placement not beholden to any product, still guides us through these vapid and cheerless times, looking no older than he did on my grandmother's old Dumont console. Age and irrelevance are impotent strains in that ebony void, where man and chair and houseplant incite our cerebellums to awaken. The cultural immunization of the Oath, muttered in earnest unison, will shield us from our basest media appetites.

Watching he who watches for us, the wholesome authority of the sunless hours, our revivified intellectual consciousness will fend off slumber, ever to prevail.
 

"They're Not Bad Movies"

Absurd claims require absurd proof. We hear so many brazen lies in the course of a day, it no longer surprises us at all. A "payroll-advance" shark collects shocking interest rates, pitching their exploitative racket as "the smart thing to do". A local chain which peddles tasteless disks that best resemble "pizza" from a distance - frozen dough, forgettable sauce, lackluster toppings - gets away with having its badly animated mascot say, "Everybody knows we have the best pizza in town."

Mistruths come in so many forms. Bubbles don't scrub. Cereal hucksters show teenagers literally snatching currency out of their parent's hands. The corrosive influence of such deliberate deceit will be obvious for trying decades yet to come. In the nearer term, we must weigh the more benign statements of the authority figures with whom we invest our time. This keeps our skepticism nourished and our intellects keen.

Mr. Lobo has told us, "They're not bad movies... just misunderstood." The latter declaration is the easier one to prove. A concept which is harder to confirm is the first adjective in that statement - for what, truly, exemplifies "badness"?
 

We need to distinguish between two usages of the word. Absolute badness is most often identified with something that was created to be good, and has become spoiled. Bread covered with mold has crossed over into a state which prevents it form being used in manner originally intended.

The value judgement expressed as "bad" is more nebulous. A movie may have an abysmal script or an incompetent director. And the original purpose for making a movie - to illustrate, inform, or entertain - may have been deliberately ignored from the outset. Or it might have been sacrificed at some later point, in order to maximize the profit margin.

While it can be informative to understand the filmmaker's intent, we are on surer ground with the finished product (if that isn't too generous a term to use). Leacing aside motives and perceptions, we attempt to decide whether a film possesses intrinsic worth. If a level of quality is apparent. Perhaps even if it "succeeds".

This may suggest that there is a clear difference between a "poor" film and a bad one. Examples abound - movies which display both technical expertise and reprehensible events. A distinction must be made between, for example, sloppy continuity and the extravagant maiming or torture of an illegally confined hostage.

The word "pandering" has fallen out of common use, but not the behavior.

This is one possible differentiation for the "bad" label, when applied to movies. We may not look forward to Mr. Lobo's presentations, much less want to own a copy for our private collections. But we can still benefit from watching - as a bad example, or a measure our increased collective enlightenment. Even unintentional satire is a useful lesson to be drawn.

Striving to understand a film does not require our endorsement and approval.

Even a pronounced failure can educate and inform. Corruption by design lacks even those humble aspirations.
 

Privacy Policy

EMAIL:  Mr. Lobo

©2001-2007 Cinema Insomnia/FAL.net Productions

New Mailing Address:

Cinema Insomnia
1710 Broadway  #101
Sacramento, CA 95818

CI open forum